life is really uncertain...ull never know who'll go and who stays...my dearest friend...confidante...and kada...passed away last december 18,2002(wednesday)YANI...yesterday i went to her mass in holy trinity sucat...the priest's homily about death and living life made me think real deep...she died of a gunshot which her own hand had done to herself...she died at around 2 or 12 pm (according to her sister) in her dad's office because of some reasons on which we were not sure of...i almost sulked in the funeral parlor if it werent just for *her*...she was standing there outside so i went out just after the communion to see her...she still despises me that time so i have to make "bawi"...going back to yani...i never expected this to happen..everybody really never expected yani to do this...shes really a kind hearted fellow...and no matter how hard your problem is...shes still there to help you...but unfortunately,no one of her walls to lean on was there...or rather one person triggered the situation...but like what her sister has said...just dont blame anyone...cause there isnt any point in blaming anyone...shes right...coz all of us shares in the blame for her...she has given all of her friends a piece of her...yet in some point no one ever gave her what she needed...help...she needed someone to lean on...she needed someone to love...and she needed to be loved back...i admit that i also havent given her much attention lately...complacent that she would always be one jeepney ride away...now...shes one lifetime away...yani...u have given me much more than what i have asked for...i had given you less than what u have deserved... but i know its too late to tell u this...but ill still say it anyway...yani im sorry...yani i love you...yani i miss you...