empty
this is how i feel now. not numb. not angry. empty. there is something missing in my life. its not because im not happy with my life. its because i lack something. my body can not fully rest if i fail to find it.
our relationship has reached its peak. and now the magic is gradually subsiding. i can feel it. and i know that she feels it as well. but my way of bringing it back only made things worse. the person that i thought that i could love with both my head and heart now used her head and i, again used my tired heart.
i opened my whole heart to her in just a day and she complained that she cant take my unnecessary woes and pains. maybe there is really something wrong with me handling depression. i didnt like this to happen. then why does this always happen to me? havent i learned from the past relationships in which more than blood was shed?do i really have to leave my comfort zone in order for me to learn?iam hurting inside. i really do. i dont know where to start filling the gaps of my broken heart.


senti songs.
cigarette butts scattered.
lights off.
phone in my hand.
tissue on the other.

still no answer.